Cowboy's Guide to Life

The Cowboy's Guide to Life

• Don't squat with your spurs on.
• Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgments.
• Lettin' the cat out of the bag is a whole lot easier than putting it back in.
• If you are riding ahead of the herd, take a look back now and then to make sure it is still there.
• If you get to thinking that you are a person of some influence, try ordering someone else's dog around.
• Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.
• There are two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither one works.
• If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is quit digging.
• Never slap a man who is chewing tobacco.
• It don't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.
• Always drink upstream from the herd.
• When you give a lesson in meanness to a critter or a person, don't be surprised if they learn their lesson.
• When throwing your weight around, be ready to have it thrown around by someone else.
• The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back in your pocket.
• Never miss a good chance to shut up.
• There are three kinds of men. The one that learns by reading, the few who learn by observation, the rest of them have to pee on the electric fence for themselves.
• My grandfather once told me that there are two kinds of people: those who do the work and those who take the credit. He told me try to be in the first group - there's less competition there.