




: )
I solemnly swear I am up to no good
What do you expect from such simple creatures?
Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care ofthemselves.
hocolate is just another snack.
You can be President.
You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
You never have to drive to another gasstation restroom because this one
is just too icky.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on abolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for theslightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you,he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
Your belly usually hides your big hips.
One wallet and one pair of shoes one color or all seasons.
You can wear shorts no! matter how your legs look.
You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache..
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25minutes.
No wonder men are happier.
Am I the one that's going crazy?
I'm so tired of masquerading
We all pretend to be so well adjusted
Maybe it's just me and I'm disgusted
I need a room in a mental penitentiary
So lock me up with maximum security
The doctors say that they don't know whats wrong with me
So strap me down it's time for my lobotomy
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
The doctors say that I'll be getting on real soon
The doctors say that I've been making big breakthroughs
One little minute seems to last a lifetime
I'm staring at the ceiling even though you're blind
We all pretend to be so complicated
You and me just maybe dislocated (dislocated)
I need a room at a mental penitentiary
So lock me up with maximum security
The doctors say that they dont know whats wrong with me
So strap me down its time for my lobotomy
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
The doctors say that I'll be getting on real soon
The doctors say that I've been making big breakthroughs
The doctors say
The doctors say that I'm okay
The doctors changed their minds
And now I'm here to stay (HELP ME!)
Sorry maybe
I'm not crazy
I'm gonna admit, maybe
You're not so loco
The doctors say that I'll be getting out real soon
The doctors say that I've been making big breakthroughs
The doctors say that I'm not crazy after all
The doctors say take two of these and give me a call
Get up!
I heard the bells on Christmas day
Their old familiar carols play,
And wild and sweet the words repeat
Of peace on earth, good will to men.
I thought how, as the day had come,
The belfries of all Christendom
Had rolled along th' unbroken song
Of peace on earth, good will to men.
And in despair I bowed my head
"There is no peace on earth," I said,
"For hate is strong and mocks the song
Of peace on earth, good will to men."
Then pealed the bells more loud and deep:
"God is not dead, nor doth He sleep;
The wrong shall fail, the right prevail
With peace on earth, good will to men."
Till ringing, singing on its way
The world revolved from night to day,
A voice, a chime, a chant sublime

LLA 1.4
A Descriptive Paragraph
The pictures are awesome....but wait until you read the words
Q: What is the shortest chapter in the Bible?
A: Psalms 117
Q: What is the longest chapter in the Bible?
A: Psalms 119
Q: Which chapter is in the center of the Bible?
A: Psalms 118
Fact: There are 594 chapters before Psalms 118
Fact: There are 594 chapters after Psalms 118
Add these numbers up and you get 1188
Q: What is the center verse in the Bible?
A: Psalms 118:8
Q: Does this verse say something significant about God's perfect will for our lives?
The next time someone says they would like to find
God's perfect will for their lives and that they want to
be in the center of His will, just send them to the
center of His Word!
Psalms 118:8
"It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man."
Now isn't that odd how this worked out (or was God in the center of it)?
Before sending this I said a prayer for you. Got a minute? 60 seconds for God?
All you do is say a small prayer for the person who sent you this........
"Father God bless my friend and provide for them whatever
he/she may be needing this day!
And may his/her life be full of your peace,
prosperity and power as he/she seeks to have a
closer relationship with You.
Amen"
Then send it on to 10 other people. Within hours 10 people have prayed
for you, and you caused a multitude of people pray to God for other people
Then sit back and watch the power of God work in your life...
When things get tough, always remember...
Faith doesn't get you around trouble, it gets you through it !!
God Bless You!
ALWAYS AND FOREVER




The Cowboy's Guide to Life